Sometimes people think they know where their life is heading. It took a nightmare for me to finally see where — and how — I should be moving forward in life.
People should be able to catch glimpses of their future. But in reality there are those who see nothing, and can only sense trouble ahead.
This nightmare of mine seemed like I was looking at my life through a camera lens, but I wasn’t getting the full picture. I dreamt I had killed myself. I wondered how did it all come to his, how my secret cries for help that I laid down like bread crumbs in a forest weren’t noticed.
I thought this was the only way to silence the voices in my head. I thought I had no one to stand beside me as I battled my demons. I thought this was the only way to end my pain.
While the pain is gone, it has been replaced with a feeling of immeasurable regret. But in this nightmare, I realize that only in my dreamt death just how wrong I am.
People aren’t as accepting of mental health as they truly say they are.
And that’s when I woke up and realized I was having a nightmare.
It wasn’t just a horrible dream but also the startling realization that I was losing myself. It was at that moment, I knew that I no longer wanted to be in that mindset of someone who is depressed, someone who is broken down, someone who has taken things beyond the point of no return.
However, not all people have the fortune of experiencing the same awakening that I did.
Each year, the number of suicide related deaths continues to rack up. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), nearly 800,000 people are taking their lives every year.
That is one person every 40 seconds, and as far as I am concerned, anything more than zero is far too many.
While suicide can affect any and every one, it is quite common among young adults. According to WHO, suicide is the second leading cause of death worldwide among 15- to 29-year-olds.
This doesn’t have to be the end.
This mustn’t be the end.
Hold on for better days. Just because you cannot see them, doesn’t mean they aren’t on the way.
Don’t be afraid to speak out about your feelings. There are trustworthy people who you can confide in, be it a loved one, a workmate, or even the bus driver on your morning commute. Don’t be ashamed to speak about your pain loud.
You can also call Crisis Services Canada at 1-833-456-4566, they are available 24/7 and are completely toll free. You can also text them at 45645, every day from 4 p.m. to 12 a.m. There are numerous other helplines, including the KidsHelpPhone for those 20 and under at 1-800-668-6868, the First Nations and Inuit Hope for Wellness 24/7 Help Line 1-855-242-3310, and the Ontario Crisis Line for all ages at 1-866-531-2600.
Keep your head up, and remain hopeful for the bright future that you rightfully deserve.